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Vituko 10 vya Simu za Kichina

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Vituko vya simu za kichina
  1. Unaweza pata kwa Shs 5,000 tu
  2. Inapata chagi ndani ya dakika tatu
  3. In TV, Radio, interneti, tochi, kamera, screen za kushika, yaani touch screen, kata kucha, kiwashio cha sigara, opener nk
  4. Unaweza kuandika kwa kutumia vijiti
  5. Makosa madogomadogo kama NokLa, blackderry, i-porn, samswag nk
  6. Ndege ikipita inasema  “one missed call”.
  7. Lori likipita inaonyesha “charger connected”.
  8. Mchina akipita inaonyesha “one Bluetooth device found”.
  9. Ni disposable, ikiharibika haitenngenezeki, ni ya kutupa tu
  10. Zinapatikana karibu kwa sura zote yaani unaweza kupata Iphone, Samsung, nokia, sony, HTC nk

Kansiime Anne the suspicious host. African comedy.

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Kichekesho cha Mwanasheria Kijana na Fundi wa Simu

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Kichekesho cha mwanasheria na mteja


Jamaa mmoja mwanasheria mchanga kutoka chuo kikuu aliamua kujiajiri kwa kufungua kiofisi kidogo. 


Siku moja alimuona kijana mtanashati akiiwa anakuja ofisini kwake. Alipokaribia jamaa kachukua simu ya mezani na kuanza kuongea. 


Jamaa: Ile deni langu la dola elfu 50 mtanilipa lini?.


Jamaa kwenye simu: Tutakulipa mwisho wa mwezi bosi.


Jamaa: Hapana, ninazihitaji haraka kwani wiki ijayo nitakuwa na safari ya kwenda Marekani na nitapitia Uholanzi kulipia lile gari langu la dola elfu 90.


Jamaa wa kwenye simu: Mbona akaunti yako hatuna!


Jamaa: Wewe ingiza tu kwenye akaunti ile ile mliyonitumia dola laki moja mwezi ulipita.


Alipomaliza kuongea kwenye simu jamaa akamgeukia mgeni wake


Jamaa: Samahani mteja kwa kukuchelewesha, unajua nina mambo mengi sana


Mgeni: Samahani usijali, mimi ni fundi wa TTCL, nimekuja kurekebisha laini kwa sababu haikuwa hewani tangu juzi

Some cars have human diseases. Kansiime Anne. Afri

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Mtoto wa Miezi Tisa Ashitakiwa Kwa Jaribio la Mauaji Pakistani

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Mtoto wa miezi tisa ashitakiwa jaribio la mauaji pakistani

Mtoto wa miezi tosa (9) mafichoni kule LAHORE Pakistan kwa sababu ana kesi ya kujibu. Mtoto huyo pichani ambaye hata hawezi kunyanyua chupa yake ya maziwa anadaiwa kushiriki kwenye jaribio la mauaji.

Baby huyo anayeitwa Musa Khan sasa yuko mafichoni kwani polisi wanamtafuta. Wiki iliyopita mtoto huyo alipelekwa mahakamani na kutajiwa kesi hiyo ya jaribio la mauaji katika mojawapo ya mahakama mjini LAHORE.

Pamoja na mtoto huyo Baba yake na Babu yake wanahukumiwa pia. Sakata hilo lilianza pale polisi mmoja na mfanyakazi wa kampuni moja ya gesi aliyekuwa anakusanya bili za muda mrefu waliporushiwa mawe na waandamanaji wanaopinga kupunguzwa kwa gesi na kupandishwa bei.

Kesi ya kichanga hiki inaonyesha wazi udhaifu ulioko kwenye sheria za PAkistani

Hata hivyo taarifa za hivi punde kutoka LAHORE, Pakistani zinasema kuwa mahakama hiyo imemfutia kesi mtoto huyo

Kwenye mitandao mingine:

Child’s play: Pakistani 9-month-old baby accused of attempted murder
http://rt.com/news/pakistan-baby-attempted-murder-577/
Apr 5, 2014 Mohammad Musa might not be old enough to have taken his first step or sounded his first word, but that has not stopped a Pakistani court from …

Pakistani infant accused of attempted murder – USA Today
http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2014/04/08/pakistan-infant-charged-attempted-murder/7479455/
3 days ago A 9-month-old Pakistani boy accused of attempted murder for allegedly throwing stones at police has been sent into hiding because of …

Pakistani baby accused of attempted murder – Yahoo News
https://news.yahoo.com/pakistan-policeman-suspended-accusing-baby-attempted-murder-004853608.html
Apr 4, 2014 Lahore (Pakistan) (AFP) – While many children his age are still learning how to crawl, a nine-month-old boy in Pakistan has been accused of …

Pakistani baby charged with attempted murder goes into hiding …
http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/apr/08/pakistan-baby-charged-attempted-murder-hiding
3 days ago The family of a Pakistani baby charged with attempted murder say … Musa and his co-accused tried to kill the gas company workers and the …

Pakistani Baby Goes on the Lam After Being Accused of Attempted …
http://www.thewire.com/global/2014/04/pakistani-nine-month-old-baby-accused-of-murder-on-the-lam/360312/
4 days ago A nine-month-old Pakistani baby accused of attempted murder has gone into hiding in an attempt to avoid charges that could be, maybe, …

9-Month-Old Boy Accused Of Attempted Murder In Pakistan
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/04/04/9-month-old-murder-pakistan_n_5092253.html
Apr 4, 2014 Sadly, this isn’t an Onion story. A 9-month-old boy accused of attempted murder in Pakistan appeared in court with his grandfather on Thursday …

Pakistan: Nine-month-old boy accused of planning murder – BBC
http://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-news-from-elsewhere-26887186
Apr 4, 2014 WATCH: The young boy accused of planning murder, and his … Court appearance for Pakistani baby charged with attempted murder 3 hrs ago …

9-month-old Pakistani boy accused of attempted murder, stoking …
http://www.ctvnews.ca/world/9-month-old-pakistani-boy-accused-of-attempted-murder-1.1768701
2 days ago LAHORE, Pakistan — A 9-month-old Pakistani boy has been swept up in an attempted murder investigation that highlights the country’s …

 

Vituko vya Housegeli na Mama Mwenye Nyumba

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Housegirl na mama mwenye nyumba

“Kichekesho cha msichana wa kazi za nyumbani na mama mwenye nyumba juu ya vijiti vya kusafishia meno.

jamani nyie watoto wa nyumba hii, vijiti vya meno nimeleta juzi tu leo vyote vimeisha, mnazipeleka wapi?”

Ndipo housegirl akadakia na kusema “Mama mimi simo humo maana kila nikimaliza kutumia tu navirudishiaga humo humo”